Home
by closet-hopeless-romantic
Summary: Harm is back flying Series 4 but something's missing. No prizes for guessing what!But what is he going to do about it?
1. Chapter 1

**I've finally left the fixing Paraguay fics behind me and have moved to an interesting time: Season 4, once Harm has left to go back to flying. I haven't actually seen any of these series, so please excuse any mistakes I make.**

**Harm comes to a realisation about Mac, now what will he do about it?!**

* * *

"Hey Hammer, it's time for chow!" Tuna's voice came from the doorway, causing Harm to look up from the piece of paper he was studying intently, a pen hanging loosely in his right hand.

"Ok man, I'll be right there." He replied, grinning at his younger bunkmate.

"Who are you writing to?"

Harm sighed and put the pen and paper down, "no-one." He replied. He'd been trying to write a letter to Mac, but just didn't know where to start. Tuna grinned up at him,

"So you've got a girl?!" he said teasingly, "You kept that one quiet!" Harm shook his head,

"She's not my girl, she's just a friend. I just haven't heard from her for a while that's all."

"Alright man, I believe you; thousands wouldn't!" Tuna replied with a knowing grin, "C'mon, we've got pre-flight in a couple of hours – let's go eat!"

It had been 5 weeks since he had left JAG, 5 weeks since he had left his new life to go back to his old one and he was surprised at just how much he missed his life at JAG. If he was honest with himself, the main thing he missed was Mac; the look on her face when they had said goodbye haunted his nights, and thoughts of her permeated through his every waking moment. Leaving JAG, and more importantly leaving her, had been enough to push him to realise his true feelings. Every day he would sit down at a computer or desk to write her a note; even just a quick email to see how she was doing, and found that words failed him. He became the writing equivalent of tongue-tied.

**Another summer day  
****  
as come and gone away  
****  
In Paris and Rome  
****  
But I wanna go home  
****  
May be surrounded by **

**A million people I **

**Still feel all alone **

**Just wanna go home **

**Oh I miss you, you know **

More and more he found himself wondering if he had done the right thing. He loved being back in the air again, and even enjoyed the good-natured banter from his younger colleagues. But there was something missing. It had taken a while to put his finger on it, but a run in with the ship's onboard JAG had been enough to send his memory spiralling back to Washington, to JAG and Mac. He hadn't heard from her since he had started his tour. He'd had a couple of messages from Bud and Harriet, but messages from Mac had been conspicuously absent.

**And I've been keeping all the letters that I wrote to you **

**Each one a line or two **

**"I'm fine baby, how are you?"**

**Well, I would send them but I know that it's just not enough **

**My words were cold and flat **

**And you deserve more than that **

He guessed she was mad at him. And part of him understood. He had left her; not by choice but in her eyes he knew that wouldn't make any difference. The worst part was, he hadn't left her. Not really. He'd left a bit of himself behind without even realising it. He loved her; he just didn't know if she felt the same way.

**Another aeroplane **

**Another sunny place **

**I'm lucky I know **

**But I wanna go home **

**I got to go home **

**Let me go home **

**I'm just too far from where you are **

**I wanna come home **

As he followed Tuna down to the mess, he found himself lost in memories.

_"You said you were happy for me."  
"That's different you were in love."  
"And you're not?"  
"What does love have to do with anything?"  
"Hey."  
"Want me to water your plants for you?"  
"I don't have any plants."  
"I have so much I want to say to you, I just can't find the words."  
"I know."  
"Damn you, why am I the only one crying?"_

She hadn't been the only one who'd cried. The moment she had left, he had sunk down in his chair unable to stop the tears from falling. The memory of holding her in his arms, even for just a second had stayed with him; the small spark of hope that he couldn't quite extinguish.

**And I feel just like I'm living someone else's life **

**It's like I just stepped outside **

**When everything was going right **

**And I know just why you could not **

**Come along with me **

**This was not your dream **

**But you always believed in me **

He was going to write to her tonight. He decided firmly, he needed to hear from her; know she was ok. Suddenly he was shaken from his thoughts by Tuna's voice.

"Hammer?! Hey Hammer are you with us?" He looked at his bunkmate, knowing he had been busted again. "Welcome back to the land of the living man!" Tuna added with a knowing grin.

"Sorry." Harm replied, "I'm just a little tired; comes from having a bunkmate who snores!!" he added with a teasing grin.

"Yeah, whatever. Who is she?" Harm rolled his eyes,

"There's no girl all right?!" Tuna gave him a look that clearly said 'yeah right' as they were joined by Skates.

"Hey guys, did you hear about the JAG?" she asked, reaching over and stealing a chip (I'm sorry, French fry) from the uneaten pile on Harm's plate.

"No, what about her?" Tuna replied.

"She's pregnant. She's being sent back home. They're sending a replacement from Washington. Do you think you'll know them Hammer?" Harm felt his heart start to beat faster, as that spark of hope grew and grew.

"Maybe." He replied non-committally. "Have you heard a name yet?"

"Not yet. I'll keep my ear out though." She casually reached for another chip and noticed the shell-shocked look on Harm's face. "Hey Hammer get your head out of the clouds will you?! Pre-flight's in an hour."

**Another winter day has come **

**And gone away **

**And even Paris and Rome **

**And I wanna go home **

**Let me go home **

Harm completed the trap with skilled efficiency and taxied out of the way so that Tuna could follow him down.

"Nice flying Hammer." Skates said cheerfully from behind him. He glanced in the mirror at her grinning face. "So I'm not too bad for an old guy huh Skates?" he replied teasingly; he and Skates flew well together, he couldn't ask for a better or more loyal RIO.

"No Sir, not by half!" she replied, before adding, "you'll miss it when you go back to JAG won't you?!" She smirked as she met his startled eyes. "Don't worry, I won't tell the boys, that's your job."

"How did you know I was thinking about changing my designator again?"

"You miss JAG." She replied simply, "more than you ever missed flying. There's something missing in your life, although I don't really think it's the job, I think it's something..or someone at the job." Harm sighed. The seat of a Tomcat really wasn't the place for this discussion.

"I haven't made my mind up yet Skates." He replied, "Besides, I'm not sure if I'll actually have anything to go back to."

"Sure you will." Skates said easily, "But who the hell am I going to fly with when you go?!" she added with a grin.

**And I'm surrounded by **

**A million people I **

**Still feel alone **

**Let me go home **

**Oh, I miss you, you know **

**Let me go home **

**I've had my run **

**Baby, I'm done **

**I gotta go home **

**Let me go home **

**It'll all be alright **

**I'll be home tonight **

**I'm coming back home **

Once he had changed out of his flight gear, Harm headed straight for the deck computer room and nabbed himself a computer. He paused for moment, his fingers poised over the keyboard.

__

_**Dear Sarah,**_

He rolled his eyes and quickly pressed the delete key.

_**Dear Mac, **_he started again,

_**Hi! How are you doing? How's JAG? Things are going okay here, although I've been pretty busy. I'm not sure if my 'old man's body' is cut out for the continued traps anymore!**_

_**Bud and Harriet sent me a few pictures of baby AJ, I can't believe how much he has grown! He's beautiful. **_

_**Anyway, I'm sorry it's taken me so long to get in touch, I wasn't sure you'd want to hear from me.**_

_**I miss you Ninja Girl,**_

_**Harm **_

He read over what he had written and paused again, this time with the cursor hovering over the send button. He hesitated, unable to press the button; what if she really didn't want to hear from him? He sighed quietly to himself, berating himself for being such a coward, then pressed the delete button before he could stop himself. Logging off quickly, he got to his feet, and headed out to the one place on ship that he could think: Vulture's Row.

**And I'm surrounded by **

**A million people I **

**Still feel alone **

**Let me go home **

**Oh, I miss you, you know **

**Let me go home **

**I've had my run **

**Baby, I'm done **

**I gotta go home **

**Let me go home **

**It'll all be alright **

**I'll be home tonight **

**I'm coming back home **

**

* * *

**

Thanks for reading!! I hope you enjoyed it. Do you want more? Want to find out what happens when Mac (yes of course the replacement will be Mac!!) comes on board?

**All reviews, good and bad, welcome!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you to all who reviewed the last chapter! You guys made my day! :o)**

**I hope you like this next bit. **

**Song is 'Come Home' by One Republic.**

* * *

Mac checked her email for what felt like the twentieth time that day. Still nothing from Harm. She knew that was partly her fault, it wasn't as if she had emailed him. Every time she tried to write something, she just couldn't. There was so much she wanted to say to him that even the simplest 'hi, how are you?' email seemed ridiculous and wrong. She couldn't even really ask Harriet or Bud if they had heard anything from him because they would want to know why she hadn't gotten in contact herself. She really missed him; every morning she would walk into Headquarters and expect to see him standing chatting to Bud in the bullpen. Mic would not leave her alone, which only served to make her miss Harm more. With Harm out of the way, he seemed to think that it was only a matter of time until she fell into his arms and she was sick of it. She didn't understand how someone could be so thick-skinned and persistent. In the 5 weeks since Harm had returned to active flight status, Mic had asked her out for dinner at least twice a day. Of course she was a bit mad at him as well; mad at him for leaving her, for leaving everyone, for clearing space for Mic to make his advances even more blatant. More than anything, she wished she could see him again; maybe go back in time to his office when they were saying goodbye to see if she could find her nerve and tell him what she had really been thinking. After the baby deal, she had been sure that they were slowly and surely moving towards something more. But now, she didn't know what to think. Him leaving, and not hearing from him for 5 weeks had made her wonder if she had misread the slight changes that had occurred in their relationship recently.

**Hello world  
****Hope you're listening  
****Forgive me if I'm young  
****For speaking out of turn  
****There's someone I've been missing  
****I think that they could be  
****The better half of me  
****They're in their own place trying to make it right  
****But I'm tired of justifying  
****So i say you'll.. **

A knock at the door drew her attention away from the send/receive button on her emails and she stifled a groan when she saw who was standing in her doorway.

"The Admiral wants to see us both Sarah." Mic said with a slightly smarmy grin. Mac offered him a perfunctory nod in response.

"Thanks Mic." She replied, getting to her feet.

"So anyway luv," Mic continued as he followed her out of the door, "What says you and I grab some dinner tonight? My treat?"

"Sorry Mic, I can't, I'm busy." Mac replied, rolling her eyes at Bud, who was standing by the photocopier and had caught Mic's question.

"You don't know what you're missing!" Mic replied cockily, "Maybe next time eh luv?"

"No thanks." Mac replied in irritation. The guy was just a complete jackass. "The Admiral wanted to see us Tiner?" she added as she walked into the outer office.

"You can go straight through." Tiner replied.

"Major Mackenzie and Commander Brumby reporting as ordered." Mic said (AN: I don't know who is the highest ranked officer out of the two of them?) as they walked in and came to attention in front of his desk.

"At ease." the Admiral replied, glancing up from the papers in front of him. "Have a seat." As they both sat down, he carried on. " How is the Willingsdon Court Martial coming along Major?"

"I'm still trying to track down one last witness, Sir, but we'll be ready for court on Wednesday." Mac replied.

"Do you think you'll be able to hand this one and you other two cases over to Commander Brumby this afternoon?

"Sir?" Mac looked surprised.

"I'm sending you TAD from tomorrow morning. It's likely you'll be away for a while; at least a month, while we sort out someone to replace you."

"Where am I going Sir?" Mac asked, curious.

"The shipboard JAG on the Patrick Henry is pregnant and so is being sent back to Headquarters. I'm sending you out to replace her, for the moment." AJ looked at her, his face impassive, even though he knew all too well what this revelation must be doing to her.

"The Patrick Henry, Sir?" Mac asked.

"Yes. They are patrolling in the Adriatic. They are only 5 weeks into their tour, but you won't be out there for the whole 6 months. We'll find a replacement within a month."

"Yes sir." Mac looked down at her hands. She could feel the Admiral's and Mic's eyes on her and she knew what both of them were thinking.

"Commander Brumby, you are to go over the Major's cases with her this afternoon so that you get up to speed."

"Yes sir." Brumby replied respectfully.

"Dismissed." AJ added, and they both came to attention and turned to leave. "Oh and Mac?" he added when they had reached the door. She turned around, "Send my regards to Commander Rabb won't you?" She managed a wan smile, trying to conceal her nerves,

"Of course sir."

**Come home  
****Come home  
****Cause I've been waiting for you  
****For so long  
****For so long  
****And right now there's a war between the vanities  
****But all i see is you and me  
****The fight for you is all I've ever known  
****So come home  
****Oooh **

There were a thousand butterflies jumping around in Mac's stomach as she left the Admiral's office with Brumby on her heels. She didn't even notice him follow her into her office and shut the door until she sat down at her desk and had checked her emails once again. Her head shot up in surprise at the sound of him clearing his throat.

"What can I do for you Mic?" she asked in annoyance, embarrassed that he may have noticed the disappointment in her face when he emails flashed up with 'No new unread messages'.

"Well luv, the Admiral did say you had to bring me up to speed on your cases."

"Yes he did." She replied calmly, although underneath her annoyance was growing, "But I have a couple of things to do before we start. Can we meet at 1400? The conference room isn't being used so we can use it, and I'll get Bud to join us since he will be your second chair."

"Fine. See you then Sarah." Mic replied, looking annoyed as he got to his feet.

"Oh and can you ask Bud to come see me if he is out there please?" Mac replied politely.

"Sure thing." Mic left, and barely two minutes later, Bud knocked on the open door.

"You wanted to see me Ma'am?"

"Come on in Bud, and shut the door please." Bud nodded, came in and sat down.

"Bud, I'm being sent TAD, so all of our cases are being passed on to Commander Brumby. We're meeting at 1400 in the conference room to go through things with him."

"Yes Ma'am." Bud replied, noting the out-of-sorts look on his mentor's face. "Where are you going Ma'am?" he added, after a moment's hesitation.

"Out to the Patrick Henry." Mac replied, smiling at the look of surprise on Bud's face.

"Will you see Commander Rabb?"

"Well, I'll be there a month at least Bud, I would imagine our paths will cross at some point."

"Will you take some new photos of Baby AJ out with you Ma'am? I sent him some a couple of weeks ago, but I'm sure he'd like to see some new ones." Bud replied eagerly.

"Sure Bud. I'm sure he'd love some. I'll get them this evening when I come over."

"No problem Ma'am. Is there anything else Ma'am?" Mac hesitated, she so wanted to ask him about Harm, but she just couldn't.

"No. Thank you Bud, see you at 1400."

"Thank You Ma'am." Bud replied and slid out of his chair.

**I get lost in the beauty  
****Of everything i see  
****The world ain't as half as bad  
****As they paint it to be  
****If all the sons  
****If all the daughters  
****Stopped to take it in  
****Well hopefully the hate subsides and the love can begin  
****It might start now..Yeahh  
****Well maybe I'm just dreaming out loud  
****Until then **

****

Come home

**Come home  
****Cause I've been waiting for you  
****For so long  
****For so long  
****And right now there's a war between the vanities  
****But all i see is you and me  
****The fight for you is all I've ever known  
****Ever known  
****So come home  
****Oooh **

* * *

**USS Patrick Henry, Adriatic Sea**

"So Skates, have you heard anymore about the replacement JAG?" Harm asked casually as he sat with Skates, Tuna and a few of the other pilots and RIOs in the DVD room. Skates shook her head regretfully,

"I'm afraid not. All I do know is that they'll be arriving tomorrow."

"Tomorrow?" Harm looked up in surprise. He hadn't expected it to be so soon.

"Yeah. Apparantly Lieutenant Allcott is leaving by the end of the week and I suppose the new JAG needs to be gotten up to speed. I'm sure you'll get a special mention, since the two 

of you get on so well." Skates replied teasingly. Harm couldn't help but laugh. Even he had to admit, he had deserved the dressing down he had received from Lieutenant Allcott when he had butted his nose into one of the cases she had had been reviewing. Whether or not she had really needed to do it in front of the crew in the mess was a point of contention.

_I wonder who it will be. _He wondered. _Bud maybe, he needs some shipboard experience, although with Harriet at home with his namesake, I doubt the Admiral would tear them apart just yet. Maybe it'll be Mac. _A little voice in his head added, and he felt the nerves start turning his stomach in knots. Ever since he had come to his realisation, he had come to the conclusion that he didn't have a clue what to do about it. Being across the other side of the world meant he had plenty of time to plan his next step as far as Mac was concerned.

**Everything i can't be  
****Is everything you should be  
****And that's why i need you here  
****Everything i can't be  
****Is everything you should be  
****And that's why i need you here  
****So hear this now **

Once Mac arrived, she reported to the bridge and was met by the current JAG who showed her to her quarters and gave her a tour of the carrier.

"I'll leave you to settle in Ma'am. The Captain would like you to join us on the Bridge at 1800." Lt Allcott said.

"Thank you Lieutenant." Mac replied with a warm smile. The butterflies were back in full force now that she had arrived. When they had been touring the carrier, she had kept her eyes peeled for his familiar figure, but hadn't seen him. She was terrified of his reaction, a small niggling voice inside her head was convinced that he was mad at her and that was why she hadn't heard from him. She sighed, she was being stupid, and she knew it. But her current posting had brought the thought that they were no longer in the same chain of command to front of her mind. And that terrified her. She decided to go and look for him the minute she had met with the Captain.

**Come home  
****Come home  
****Cause I've been waiting for you  
****For so long  
****For so long  
****And right now there's a war between the vanities **

As she sat in mess with Lt Allcott, she continuously scanned the mess for Harm's tall frame.

"Are you looking for someone in particular Major?" Lt Allcott asked politely, she noticed that her replacement seemed a little on edge.

Mac hesitated, "My former partner at JAG, Commander Rabb? He's recently returned to active flight duty." Lt Allcotts mouth twitched in amusement.

"Yes I've come across Lt Commander Rabb. He's flying a mission this evening, but he should be landing in about ten minutes."

"Thank you Lt." Mac replied looking relieved, although truth be told, her nerves increased tenfold when she heard Harm was actually flying.

As Harm taxied in, he grinned good-naturedly at Skates,

"I wonder if the new JAG has arrived now." He said casually. Skates chuckled,

"She was already on board when we left Hammer, where on earth have you been today?!"

"She?" Harm's eyes flashed up to meet Skates' in the mirror.

"Yeah, a Marine Major. I didn't catch her name." Harm swallowed nervously,

"MacKenzie." He replied, "Major Sarah Mackenzie."

"You know her?"

"I should do! She was my partner at JAG before I left." Skates looked back at him knowingly,

"So she's the one." She said simply, amused to see denial followed by embarrassment making their way quickly across what little of Harm's face she could see.

"The one?" he asked, a little confused, although he had a pretty good idea of what his RIO was getting at.

"The one you want to go back for." Harm just looked at her, saying nothing. He couldn't bring himself to refute it, but he didn't know what else to say. The younger woman seemed to pick up on his thoughts and grinned at him, "Are you going to tell her?"

"I don't know." Harm replied, "I haven't heard from her since I left." Skates looked at him incredulously, wondering how someone so smart could be so dense.

"You never contacted her?"

"She never contacted me either." Harm replied, coming dangerously close to pouting. Skates rolled her eyes at him,

"Don't be such an idiot Harm. You have to talk to her." She said as she went to climb out of the aircraft.

* * *

Harm sat at his usual table with Tuna and the others in the mess, watching quietly as the younger guys laughed and joked, while his eyes constantly scanned the area for a flash of Marine green.

"Hey Hammer, you with us?!" one of his companions called. Harm forced a grin to his face,

"Sorry guys, I'm just a bit distracted. I think I'm gonna go for a wander. See you all later." He replied, getting to his feet and carrying his tray over to the waste area. He wandered out of the mess and headed back up to Vultures Row to watch the active Tomcats landing and taking off. He always found it soothing to watch, and he stood, leaning on the railings, staring out to sea.

At the same time, Mac was doing her best to locate Harm. She'd tried all the rec rooms and a couple of the computer rooms but he wasn't there. She wondered briefly if he had heard she was onboard and was avoiding here, but deep down she knew Harm wasn't like that so she headed up to the last place she could think of.

As she came out of the hatch, the warm air that hit her was a welcome counter to the sudden flash of cold nerves that hit her as she saw his tall frame leaning against the railing about 5 metres in front of her. Taking a deep breath, she forced herself to put one foot in front of the other until she was standing just behind him,

"A penny for your thoughts sailor?" she said softly. He stiffened instantly, and turned around nervously. Their eyes met and they stood in silence for a couple of seconds, before his eyes and mouth crinkled into a slightly nervous smile.

"Hey Mac." He replied.

**But all i see is you and me  
****The fight for you is all I've ever known  
****Ever known  
****So come home  
****Come home**

**

* * *

**

Muahahaha...So that's chapter 2 over and done with!! I hope you enjoyed it! I certainly enjoyed writing it!

**As always, if you enjoyed it then press the little blue button and let me know! Same goes if you hated it! All feedback is appreciated!**

**Thanks for reading! :o)**


	3. Chapter 3

**

* * *

**

Hey guys, sorry for the slight delay in getting this posted, I found it quite hard to write.

**The reason I left the last chapter at such a crucial point was because I hadn't actually decided whether I wanted them to be pissy with each other or awkward and shy. I've done them angry so many times, I decided awkward would be a good way to take this so I hope you'll feel I captured that quite well.**

**I've also exhausted the total of appropriate songs in my iTunes playlist that has the word 'home' in the title, so I've used Corrine Bailey Rae's 'Like a Star' as a backdrop instead.**

**Ok, enough of me! Thanks for all the reviews for the last chapter! :o)**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

"A penny for your thoughts sailor?" she said softly. He stiffened instantly, and turned around nervously. Their eyes met and they stood in silence for a couple of seconds, before his eyes and mouth crinkled into a slightly nervous smile.

"Hey Mac." He replied. They stood for a moment in an uncomfortable silence.

"Can I join you?" Mac pointed to the railing that Harm had been leaning on only moments before.

"Sure." Harm replied with a shy smile, turning back to the railing and leaning casually on it, staring out to sea. Mac copied his actions and they stood there side by side for a few minutes, neither one knowing what to say.

**Just like a star across my sky,  
****Just like an angel off the page,  
****You have appeared to my life,  
****Feel like I'll never be the same,  
****Just like a song in my heart,  
****Just like oil on my hands,  
****Honoured to love you, **

"How's everyone at JAG?" Harm asked as the silence got to him, forcing him to break it.

"They're fine. They all miss you. I saw little AJ last night, he's absolutely beautiful. Looks more and more like Harriet every day. Bud gave me some photos to give you."

"Thanks. The one I have is a few weeks old now. How are Bud and Harriet doing?"

"Tired," Mac replied with a slight chuckle, "But they are over the moon, and Bud has been invaluable on our last few cases. We're not quite the dream team we were but.." she trailed off as she realised how much of a guilt trip that sounded, "Well, uhh, you know, Bud's still Bud." She continued lamely.

"And what about you Mac?" Harm asked softly, "Do you miss me?"

**Still I wonder why it is,  
****I don't argue like this,  
****With anyone but you,  
****We do it all the time,  
****Blowing out my mind, **

_More than you can know, _Mac thought, turning to look at him. He was still staring into the distance, as if he wasn't sure if he wanted to know the answer.

"Have you missed me?" she countered, unable to voice the answer to his questions, worried he would be able to read exactly how she felt in her answer.

"I've missed everyone." He replied cagily. The atmosphere was still nervous and tense, and he had no idea how to get it back to the way things used to be. Mac quirked an eyebrow at him,

"Even Mic and Singer?!" she asked, even as she felt a little piece of her die inside. He obviously felt nothing for her. He turned and looked down at her,

"Ok, so maybe not everyone." He replied with a grin, hesitating before his face softened, and he added in an undertone, "and some more than others." Mac glanced up quickly, having caught his quiet words, and was disappointed to see his mask of rigid control had snapped straight back into place.

"Are you enjoying being back out there?" she nodded in the direction of the lights of the most recent Tomcat to shoot off the deck.

"It's been an adjustment." Harm admitted. "I really do love flying Mac, but.." he paused, unsure of how to explain how he was feeling without sounding like a petulant child.

"But what?"

He sighed, "Nothing." He replied, "it's fine."

"Harm?" Mac's voice was hesitant. "What's.." she was cut off by Harm's voice,

"Sorry, Mac, I'm afraid I've got to go. Skates and I have the early run tomorrow." He turned to face her, "It's good to see you Mac."

"You too.." she offered him a smile, which he returned shyly and then walked away.

**You've got this look I can't describe,  
****You make me feel like I'm alive,  
****When everything else is au fait,  
****Without a doubt you're on my side,  
****Heaven has been away too long,  
****Can't find the words to write this song,  
****Oh.  
****Your love, **

"So, did you have a nice reunion with your Major?!" Skates asked Harm teasingly as they headed up to the flight deck for their next mission. Harm looked at her, the expression on his face telling her exactly what she wanted to know. "Hammer! You're an idiot!" she added, repeating the words that had been going round and round in Harm's head all night. He had never had a more uncomfortable conversation with Mac before and he didn't know how to change it. He didn't know how to tackle the elephant in the room which had appeared through their lack of communication.

"I just couldn't do it." He admitted, "It was too awkward. We hadn't spoken to each other in 5 weeks. It just felt weird."

"You have to say something. Especially if you are going to go back to JAG." Harm looked at her.

"When did you become so perceptive anyway?!" he grumbled under his breath. Unfortunately, Skates heard him, and replied with a good-natured grin,

"Because you need someone to tell you these things. You'd be clueless without me!" He rolled his eyes at her,

"I do not." He replied, once again coming dangerously close to pouting.

"Whatever Harm!" Skates replied, "You are going to tell that woman how you feel or I am going to do it for you!" Suddenly a voice came from behind them,

"You know who Hammer's woman is?! Man, I'm hurt."

"Morning Tuna." Harm and Skates chorused.

"Seriously Skates, why haven't you told me about all about her?" Tuna replied, throwing a grin in the direction of his bunkmate.

"Nothing to tell I'm afraid," Harm interjected quickly, "I don't have a girl."

"Only because you're chicken-shit!" Skates retorted as the trio made their way to their respective aircraft.

"Skates!" Harm protested weakly as the other two laughed.

**Still I wonder why it is,  
****I don't argue like this,  
****With anyone but you,  
****We do it all the time,  
****Blowing out my mind, **

A little while later, Mac was lying in her bunk, her mind working overtime as she overanalysed every last second of her encounter with Harm. It had been so awkward, nothing like their usual relationship. She sighed as she remembered him holding her in his arms before he left. She was sure she wasn't imagining it; they had been moving towards a new place in their relationship. They had been closer than ever. So what had gone wrong? Why hadn't they spoken for the last 5 weeks. It was just so strange. Even their previous habit of bickering like children would be preferable the wall that seemed to have been built between them in his absence. She would seek him out later, she decided, and ask him what was going on. Her mine now made up, she got up and dressed and headed to the Mess.

Skates was just picking up her breakfast when she saw the new JAG walk into the mess. Harm had gone to change out of his flight suit, but the others were all sitting at their usual table, so she went over and joined them, keeping an eye on the Marine Major, who shortly after, walked close to the table in search of an empty place.

"Major Mackenzie!" Skates called, after only a moment's hesitation. She knew Harm would kill her, but she didn't care. It was better than him moping around all day. The older woman turned and looked questioningly at her. "There's space here if you would like to join us Ma'am." Mac looked confused for a moment, but nodded,

"Thank you, Lieutenant..."

"Hawkes, Ma'am, Liz Hawkes. I'm Commander Rabb's RIO."

"It's nice to meet you Lt." Mac replied, "But how did you know my name? I'm sure scuttlebutt doesn't act that quickly."

"Harm's talked about you a bit Ma'am." Skates replied with an impish grin.

**I have come to understand,  
****The way it is,  
****It's not a secret anymore,  
****'cause we've been through that before,  
****From tonight I know that you're the only one,  
****I've been confused and in the dark,  
****Now I understand, **

Harm walked into the Mess in a cheerful mood. He grabbed some cereal from the shelf and some milk from the fridge and headed over to join the others. As the table came into view, he stopped dead in surprise. Mac was sat at the table, laughing at something with Skates. She looked up, suddenly aware of his presence, and smiled shyly,

"Morning Harm." She said. He returned her smile, but didn't say anything, instead choosing to look questioningly at Skates, to see if she had given away his secret. Skates shook her head imperceptibly, catching the question in his glance. She would never have actually told Mac anything; but if this helped give him a little push then all the better.

"Are you going to sit down Grandpa?!" Tuna asked jokingly, as he watched the interaction between the three of them. Harm shook himself slightly and grinned at his bunkmate,

"Sure." He replied, taking the last available seat, next to Skates and opposite Mac.

"Morning Mac." He said softly.

There was another awkward pause, until Skates jumped in,

"I was just telling the Major about your run in with Lt Allcott." They all laughed, and Harm put on his most wounded look.

"It wasn't fair! I was only trying to help and she humiliated me in front of half the crew!" he said

"Suck it up Sailor!" Mac retorted good-naturedly, "It can't have been any worse than your run-ins with the Admiral!"

"You wound me, Mac!" Harm replied, his smile getting a little wider, as he felt the ice around his heart begin to thaw a little and he added, "At least I had you with me for those!"

They both stopped and stared at each other for a moment, and Harm felt a wave of nostalgia crash over him.

"Batman and Robin." He murmured, catching Mac's eye and holding her gaze. They were interrupted from their reverie by Skates jumping to her feet.

"Well we better get going." She said, as the rest of the table bar Harm and Mac followed suit, "Don't forget we have pre-flight for our next run in 3 hours." Harm offered her a nervous smile,

"See you later guys." He replied, and they all left, adding their goodbyes to that of Skates.

There was silence again.

"So.." Harm started, "are you settling in ok?" Mac rolled her eyes at him, suddenly sick of the awkward moments,

"Are we going to be reduced to small talk for the rest of my time here?" she countered. Harm looked at her in surprise, and blushed slightly,

"I'm sorry," he mumbled, "it's just a little strange seeing you out here, while I'm out here doing this." He paused, "I'm sorry I never emailed you." he added, "I tried. I just never knew what to say." Mac gave him a weak smile,

"Me either." She admitted. "I've really missed you, you know. I just figured you were too busy being a jet jock to remember little old me." To her surprise, she felt tears prick in her eyes, and she blinked them away angrily. He reached across to take her hand in his, until a Petty Officer passing close to the table alerted him to where they were.

"Can we do this somewhere else?" he said, pulling back slightly. Mac smiled,

"Sure. Let's go to my office."

**I wonder why it is,  
****I don't argue like this,  
****With anyone but you,  
****I wonder why it is,  
****I won't let my guard down,  
****For anyone but you  
****We do it all the time,  
****Blowing out my mind, **

Harm followed Mac into her office and was unsurprised to see it already looking like a bombsite, with papers everywhere.

"Made yourself at home I see Marine?!" he said teasingly.

"I couldn't understand Lt Allcott's filing system." She retorted good naturedly,

"So you felt the need to throw it around the room?!"

"As I recall, your filing system could have done with a little work Flyboy!"

"At least you could see my desk!" they stopped and grinned at each other. Then Harm's expression changed, "I did miss you Sarah. More than you will ever know." Mac's eyes widened at his use of her Christian name.

"So why didn't you want to talk to me?" she asked.

"Is that what you thought?" Harm sounded shocked and he moved over to stand in front of her, pulling her into a hug. "Nothing could be further from the truth. I just had so much to say and no idea how to say it."

Mac leaned into his embrace, enjoying the feeling of warmth that engulfed her at his touch.

"Well I'm here now Sailor." Harm pulled back slightly, and looked down at her. Mac stared back at him, her eyes wide and hopeful. Could she be reading this right?

"When I first came on board, I was really excited to be back flying. It was what I had trained to do, and I felt like I finally had a second chance to see how things might have worked out." He paused, gathering the courage to go on. "But the longer I was out here, I realised that there was something missing, there was a hole inside of me." Mac looked puzzled and opened her mouth to speak.

"Wha..?" the question died on her lip as he reached down and took her hand in his, raising it up level with his chest.

"You." he said simply, placing her hand, and his with it, on his heart. "I think I've fallen in love with you, and I didn't know how to tell you, or if you'd even want to know."

**Just like a star across my sky,  
****Just like an angel off the page,  
****You have appeared to my life,  
****Feel like I'll never be the same,  
****Just like a song in my heart,  
****Just like oil on my hands**

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Ok, Ok, I'm sorry for the cliffy...again...I just can't resist them! I hope you enjoyed that chapter. I'll have the next one up ASAP I promise, it's already started.

**As always, I live for your reviews, so please let me know if you liked it (or even if you didn't!)**


	4. Chapter 4

**Ok, I'm back! Sorry about the cliffie, I just couldn't resist! **

**Thank you to all who reviewed! :o)**

**I hope you like this next bit!**

**Song is 'Your Everything' by Keith Urban**

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"You." he said simply, placing her hand, and his with it, on his heart. "I think I've fallen in love with you, and I didn't know how to tell you, or if you'd even want to know."

**The first time I looked in your eyes I knew  
****That I would do anything for you  
****The first time you touched my face I felt  
****What I'd never felt with anyone else.**

There was a shocked silence as Mac stared up at Harm, her eyes rapidly filling with tears. Harm felt ice grip his heart at he looked at her. She obviously didn't feel the same way. He stepped back suddenly, releasing her from his embrace.

"I'm sorry." He muttered, "I understand. We can just forget I ever said anything." He took another step away, a part of him still hoping that she would stop him. She was still staring at him in shock, her brown eyes marred by tears.

"Harm..." she started softly,

"No, it's fine, I'm sorry I said anything. I didn't mean to put you in such an awkward position." Harm said over her, terrified to hear what she was about to say. "Let's just forget it. I don't want to lose your friendship, please, Mac, promise me..."

"Harm!" Mac shouted suddenly, interrupting his apologetic tirade.

**I wanna give back what you've given to me  
****And I wanna witness all of your dreams  
****Now that you've shown me who I really am  
****I wanna be more than just your man.**

He stopped, and looked at her. She took a step forward,

"Will you let me talk?" Harm opened his mouth as if to reply, but hesitated and settled for nodding his head, not quite trusting his voice.

"I love you too." She said softly. Harm's eyes snapped up to meet hers and she nodded slightly, "The last few weeks have been horrible. It felt like you had left me, that you didn't want anything to do with me." She felt tears run down her face, but made no effort to brush them away. "I missed you like crazy. I hated not talking to you, and I was scared we had missed out chance." She stopped as Harm took a step forward and lifted his hand up to gently brush the tears off her face. He gently pressed a finger to his lips, his eyes crinkling as he smiled at her. Pulling her back into his arms, he leaned down and pressed his lips to hers.

**I wanna be the wind that fills your sails  
****Be the hand that lifts your veil  
****Be the moon that moves your tides  
****The sun comin' up in your eyes  
****Be the wheel that never rusts  
****Be the spark that lights you up  
****All that you've been dreamin' of and more  
****So much more  
****I wanna be your everything.**

"I love you." Harm whispered as they pulled back from their first proper kiss, both grinning foolishly at each other.

"So what do we do now?" Mac asked after a few moments, the reality of their situation bringing them both down to earth with a bump. They were both painfully aware that once Mac left the Patrick Henry, Harm wouldn't be back in port for another 4 months and an aircraft carrier also wasn't exactly the best place to start a personal relationship.

Harm grinned impishly at her, trying to lighten the mood,

"Well I can think of something..." he replied teasingly, reaching up to block her hand as she tried to punch him on the arm.

"I'm serious, Harm." She replied, only to be rewarded with a Flyboy grin,

"So am I!" he answered, sobering quickly as he saw the look on her face. "We'll work something out, Sarah." He added, "I'm going to change my designator again; come back to JAG if the Admiral will have me." Mac stared at him,

"But flying is the most important thing in your life. You said it yourself; you only fell into being a lawyer, being a pilot is all you've ever wanted to do." There was a pause

**When you wake up I'll be the first thing you see  
****and when it gets dark you can reach out to me  
****I'll cherish your words and I'll finish your thoughts  
****I'll be your compass baby, when you get lost.**

"No." Harm replied, "You're the most important thing in my life; you have been for a long time." Mac felt the tears start to prick at her eyes again. He really could say the sweetest things!

"But what about your..?" Harm chuckled,

"Mac, I love you, and I want to be with you. I can't do that if I'm being shipped off on a carrier for 6 months at a time. I've been thinking about this since I left JAG. You're right, I do love flying. But this tour has made me realise that there are much more important things in life. I had to do this, just to know I could. Now I can leave on my own terms."

"What will we tell the others? Bud? Harriet? The Admiral?"

"Well, it's up to you, but if you don't mind, I'd like to tell them the truth." A smile a mile wide broke out over Mac's face.

"I'd like that." She replied, standing up on tip toe to press a kiss on his lips and went to step away. Harm quickly wrapped his arms firmly around her, pulling her close.

"And where do you think you are going?!" he asked, a teasing smile lighting up his handsome face, before lowering his lips back to hers, giving her a kiss she wouldn't be forgetting in a hurry. "What time is it Mac?" he asked softly when they eventually parted.

"I..uh..11.07" Mac replied after a moment's hesitation. Harm grinned at her, mentally making a note of the fact that she had lost track of time for the first time since he had known her.

"I've got to go I'm afraid. Skates'll be banging the door down looking for me soon." Mac kissed him one more time,

"Ok. I better get on with some of this paperwork anyway. Fly safe sailor" He smiled softly,

"Bye." He replied and headed out of the cabin.

**I wanna be the wind that fills your sails  
****Be the hand that lifts your veil  
****Be the moon that moves your tides  
****The sun comin' up in your eyes  
****Be the wheel that never rusts  
****Be the spark that lights you up  
****All that you've been dreamin' of and more  
****So much more  
****I wanna be your everything.**

"So Hammer, did you sort things out with Major Mackenzie?" Skates asked casually under her breath as they sat in pre-flight an hour later. Harm didn't really need to reply though, one glance at his smiling face was enough to know what had transpired. "Good on you." she continued, "although I'll miss you when you go. I enjoy flying with you." Harm looked sideways at her.

"I'm going to try and keep my status active; I'll be back for my Quals from time to time." He muttered back, "but Liz?" Skates glanced at him questioningly, he rarely called her by her Christian name, "I like flying with you too." The grinned at each other comfortably.

"Just make sure I get an invite to the wedding!" she retorted.

"I promise." Harm replied simply, much to her shock. He was a man after all, she had expected him to start sputtering and get nervous at the thought of marriage, especially to a woman he had only been with for five minutes!

**Be the wheel that never rusts  
****Be the spark that lights you up  
****All that you've been dreamin' of and more  
****So much more**

**Three weeks later**

Harm was sitting in the mess with Tuna and Skates when a young Petty Officer came up to the table.

"Commander Rabb, Major Mackenzie would like to see you in the JAG office right away, Sir." Harm ignored Tuna and Skates as they exchanged a knowing grin.

"Thank you Petty Officer." He replied, getting to his feet and following her out of the mess.

On arriving at the JAG cabin, he knocked on the hatch door and went in at Mac's call of "Enter."

"You wanted to see me?" he asked good-naturedly. Mac looked up from her desk, where she was sitting and smiled warmly at him. They had done a good job at keeping their relationship secret from the rest of the crew. Apart from Tuna and Skates, they were pretty sure no-one else knew. The last two weeks had been hard; their situation could hardly be called ideal, but both were keen to stick to regs as far as possible. Apart from a few stolen kisses in Mac's office, they hadn't had much close contact.

"The Admiral called." She replied as she got to her feet and walked round her desk to give him a quick kiss hello. "He is sending Lt Jamieson out to replace me for the rest of the tour. He'll be here tomorrow." Harm looked at her in surprise. He had known that this day was coming, but he had selfishly hoped that she would be staying on board for a bit longer.

"So you'll be leaving tomorrow?" he asked disappointedly.

"I'm afraid so." She replied, looking at him sadly. He managed a wan grin and pulled her into his arms.

"Well we knew it was going to happen eventually." He said with a sigh. "I just hoped it wasn't going to be so soon."

"Me too."

"Still," Harm added, "My tour is over in 4 months and then I'll be back in Washington for good." Mac nodded.

"I'm going to miss you so much." She said softly, "It's not fair. We finally get things on track and I have to leave." Harm leant down and kissed her gently, trying to convey as much of the emotion he was feeling into that single kiss.

"I'll be back before you know it, Mac." He said, and she nodded as they both lapsed into a comfortable silence, each enjoying the feeling of closeness to the other. "What time does your helo leave?"

"12:30." Mac replied, "Will you be there to say goodbye?"

"I've got the morning patrol of the No-Fly zone." Harm replied with a sigh, "But with any luck, I should be back by then."

"Ok." Mac replied sadly.

**I wanna be your everything.**

**The next day, 12:17**

There was a knock at the door.

"Enter." Mac called, hoping it was Harm. The hatch swung open to reveal a nervous looking Petty Officer.

"Ma'am, the Captain told me to tell you the helo has arrived. He'd like to see you on the Bridge before you go."

"Thank you Petty Officer." Mac replied, gathering up her bag and following her out of the cabin. Two minutes later she walked onto the Bridge to the familiar call of "JAG on the Bridge!"

"You wanted to see me Captain?" she asked

"I just wanted to thank you for your hard work these past weeks." Captain Engles replied with a gruff smile.

"Thank you sir." She replied politely, surreptitiously glancing out of the windows of the Bridge to see a Tomcat land on the deck and taxi in with a strange sense of urgency. For a moment Captain Engles looked like he wanted to say something else, but instead he just added,

"Dismissed!" Mac came to attention and smiled at the Captain, before making her way quickly off the Bridge and made her way to the helo pad where the chopper was waiting for her.

"Are you ready to go Ma'am?" the pilot asked as she handed him her bags.

"I thought we weren't due to take off until 12:30. It's only 12:27." She replied, much to the confusion of the pilot.

"Yes, Ma'am." He replied and stood hesitantly at her side, unsure of what to do next. They stood in silence for a while until it was 12:29. Mac sighed.

"We better get going Lt." She said resignedly, taking the headphones he handed her and moving to climb into the chopper. She lifted one foot up when she heard a shout from behind her. She stopped and turned round to see Harm racing up to her, still in his flight suit.

"Did you think you could sneak off without saying goodbye?" he asked with a Flyboy grin.

"Why goodbye and not good luck?" she responded with a grin, as he moved to stand in front of her.

"I'll miss you so much," he said so softly, she barely heard it over the roar of the propellers.

"I'll miss you to Harm." She admitted, "Permission to hug the Commander?" she asked after a pause. Harm grinned.

"Permission granted." She reached for and embraced him briefly, relishing the moment, when the helo pilot tapped her on the shoulder.

"Ma'm, we really have to go now." She pulled back reluctantly. "Bye." She said, before climbing into the helo. Once settled, she looked out to see Harm still standing where she had left him, staring directly at her. "I love you." she mouthed. She just about made out his response as the chopper began to lift. "I love you too."

**I wanna be your everything.**

Unbeknownst to them, Captain Engles had been standing on Vultures Row with the CAG and had watched their exchange with interest.

"It's a damn shame," he said.

"What's that, Sir?" the CAG replied, following the Captain's gaze to see Rabb standing at the helo pad as the chopper pulled away.

"That we're going to lose a pilot of Rabb's calibre."

"Captain?" the CAG sounded surprised.

"He'll leave us at the end of this tour, mark my words!" Engles replied, "He's got other things on his mind."

"I don't believe that for a moment, Sir." The CAG replied, "Rabb lives to fly, and he's a fantastic pilot. He loves being back flying."

"That may be. But I bet you twenty bucks that he returns to JAG at the end of this tour." The CAG glanced at him to see if he was serious.

"You're on sir." He replied, holding out his hand.

**I wanna be your everything...**

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One more chapter to go!

**Reviews help make me happy...!**

**Thanks for reading!**


	5. Chapter 5

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Ok, so I lied...it's actually going to be 2 more chapters, although this one is more of a little filler than anything else!

**Thank you so much to all who reviewed, I really appreciate it! You are all wonderful!**

**Enjoy this little bit, I'll get the last chapter up asap.**

**Song is 'I'm already there' by Lonestar**

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**2 months later**

Mac left staff call with the others and headed straight for her office, and her computer. She was missing Harm like crazy; in the 2 months since she had last seen him on the Patrick Henry, they had been emailing almost every day, but that wasn't the same as having him there: feeling his arms around her while she slept, seeing his smiling face when she walked into the office.

She hadn't heard from him for three of four days; his last email had told her that he was due to fly a large number of missions over the next few days so the delayed response was expected, but that didn't stop her from checking her email obsessively on the off chance he had managed to send her something. Slipping into her chair, she reached quickly to click on the Send/Receive button on her inbox. A huge smile appeared on her face when, amongst a pile of emails from Tiner, the Admiral and Chloe, a message from Harm appeared. She clicked on it without hesitation and settle down to read.

_Hi Ninja Girl, _

_How's my favourite marine doing?_

_Sorry it's taken me a while to get back to you, there's been some activity in the No-Fly so they have had us flying 4 missions a day to try and get a look at what's going on without breaking international law! Know any good lawyers in case I get into trouble?!_

**He called her on the road  
****From a lonely cold hotel room.  
****Just to hear her say I love you one more time  
****And when he heard the sound  
****Of the kids laughing in the background  
****He had to wipe away a tear from his eye.  
****A little voice came on the phone  
****She said, Daddy, when you coming home?  
****He said the first thing that came to his mind.**

_I've really missed hearing from you every day. I really wish I was there with you right now, _

_holding you in my arms. Ok maybe not right this second, as I'm pretty sure that would get us into some serious trouble with the Admiral, but you catch my drift._

_Only 60 more days. I can't wait! I'll be home on June 20__th__. Will you come to meet me? _

_I forgot to tell you, I spoke to the Captain and the CAG. My paperwork is being sorted as we speak. As of June 20__th__, I'll be a lawyer again. I have the option to keep my flight status active, but I wanted to discuss that with you before I make any permanent decisions._

Mac felt tears start to well up in her eyes. She couldn't believe that this was the same Harmon Rabb. The one who was usually about as emotionally accessible as a brick wall, letting her into his life with such acceptance, as if this was a forever thing, even if they hadn't been on a date yet.

_I'm glad you told Bud and Harriet. I can't believe Bud dropped his beer! That made me laugh out loud! I really wish I'd been there. Thank you for the new pictures of little AJ, I can't believe I missed his first birthday! He's growing up so fast! Give him a big kiss from me next time you see him, and tell him his Uncle Harm misses him like crazy. _

_I'm afraid I've got to go – there's a queue for the computers and Tuna is dying to check his emails – his girlfriend gave birth to their little girl last week. He's waiting on pictures!_

**I'm already there,  
****Take a look around.  
****I'm the sunshine in your hair,  
****I'm the shadow on the ground.  
****I'm the whisper in the wind,  
****I'm your imaginary friend.  
****And I know I'm in your prayers,  
****Oh, I'm already there.**

_I miss you like crazy, Sarah. I can't wait to see you!_

_All my love_

_Harm _

Mac smiled softly at the computer screen and quickly pressed reply.

**She got back on the phone  
****Said, I really miss you darlin'.  
****Don't worry about the kids, they'll be all right.  
****Wish I was in your arms,  
****Lyin' right there beside you.  
****But I know that I'll be in your dreams tonight.  
****And I'll gently kiss your lips,  
****Touch you with my fingertips.  
****So turn out the light and close your eyes.**

_Hey there Flyboy!_

_Hope you're still enjoying showing those young kids how it's done! Tell Tuna congratulations from me._

_I wish I'd had a camera when I told Bud and Harriet; the look on Bud's face was priceless! Harriet wasn't surprised of course! Sometimes I swear she is clairvoyant! They've promised not to tell anyone, but I was wondering if I shouldn't maybe mention it to the Admiral before you get back? What do you think?_

_Did you get the package I sent yet?_

_What did the Captain say when you told him? Is it all going to go through ok? I can't wait for you to be back at JAG! Of course you should keep your flight active - you've worked so hard to be able to fly, why would you want to give that up entirely? _

_I can't believe it's been two months already. Hopefully the next two will fly by! I'm counting the minutes until you get back. Of course I'll come and meet you, silly, what else did you expect me to do?!_

_Chloe told me to tell you she's glad you finally made a move – she wants to come down and visit once you're back._

_Please come back soon! Mic is driving me totally up the wall. He is such an arrogant git! I told him I was involved with someone, but has that stopped him pestering me?! No! Singer has noticed and started making rude remarks. She is such a pain the six!_

**I'm already there,  
****Don't make a sound.  
****I'm the beat in your heart,  
****I'm the moonlight shining down,  
****I'm the whisper in the wind  
****And I'll be there to the end.  
****Can you feel the love that we share?  
****Oh, I'm already there.**

_I can't wait to see you. JAG isn't JAG without you here, so come back soon, ok?!_

_I love you._

_Fly safe._

_All my love_

_Sarah _

_xx_

**We may be a thousand miles apart,  
****But I'll be with you wherever you are.**

Mac sighed quietly to herself as she pressed send. Long-distance relationships were hard. Especially when you hadn't even been out on a date with the person you were with. There was such a natural, easy feel to their messages; a testament to the strength of their friendship, she supposed. Still, 2 months wasn't that long in the grand scheme of things, and June 20th was in fact only 58 days away.

**I'm already there,  
****Take a look around.  
****I'm the sunshine in your hair,  
****I'm the shadow on the ground,  
****I'm the whisper in the wind,  
****And I'll be there to the end.  
****Can you feel the love that we share?  
****Oh, I'm already there.**

She started to look though her other messages, when a ping notified her of another new message.

It was from Harm and had the subject line: P.S

_I love you so much. _

_H xx_

**Oh, I'm already there...**

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Thanks for reading!!

**whether you loved it, or hated it, i'd love to know!! **

**xx**


	6. Chapter 6

**So here's the final chapter. Thanks for all who have reviewed, you have no idea how much I appreciate hearing what you guys think!**

**Song is by Sir Paul McCartney**

**Enjoy!**

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20th June

Harm had been packed and ready to go for the last day and a half. He couldn't wait to dock in Norfolk and finally get to hold Mac in his arms the way he had been dreaming for the last 4 months. He could barely believe that the 4 months was finally up; four long months of emails, flirtation and promises. He just couldn't wait to see her. He was a little nervous as well though; terrified that she would take one look at him and decide that she didn't want to be with him. He was up on Vultures Row, looking down at the row of Tomcats standing on the deck. The coast was visible in the distance, a dark grey hue against the blue sky. His heart skipped a beat when he realised that Mac was on that dark mass of land, waiting for him, and that he would see her in a couple of hours.  
"Taking a last look?" Skates' voice came from behind him. Harm turned slightly to look at her and smiled,  
"It's funny." He replied, "I thought I'd be sadder. I've spent so much of my life wanting to fly. I get my second chance and I'm more than happy to give it up." Skates gave him a knowing look,  
"And I'm sure that has nothing to do with a certain Marine Major who is, I imagine, waiting at Norfolk with bated breath for us to dock?!" she replied as she leant onto the railings next to him. Harm shot her an amused look,  
"It might." He replied, with a grin.

**I'm very sure  
****This never happened to me before  
****I met you and now I'm sure  
****This never happened before **

At the same time, Mac was sitting in the backseat of Bud and Harriet's car, with little AJ on her right napping in his carseat. When they had heard that Harm was arriving in port, they had insisted on driving her in their people carrier, so that little AJ could welcome back his Uncle Harm. It felt a little like a trip to a family reunion, although with less dread about seeing the embarrassing relatives! Mac had been touched when the two of them had appeared in her office the day before and recounted their plan. In his last email, Harm had been worrying about everyone's reaction to him coming back to JAG. It was obvious he had nothing to worry about. If she was honest, she wouldn't have minded meeting him on her own so that they could have some long-awaited alone time; but that would just have to wait until they got back from Norfolk, and she knew Harm would be thrilled to see Bud, Harriet and little AJ.

She glanced over at her sleeping godson and then turned her gaze back to the passing scenery. She could barely sit still. They had been waiting for this moment for 4 months and she was more than a little bit nervous. What if they had built things up between them to be something they weren't? What if he had changed his mind? What if they ended up slipping back into their old routine as friends? Mac shook her head slightly, trying to clear the pessimistic thoughts from her head. This was Harm after all. She had fallen a little bit in love with him the very first time they had met, and the few kisses they had shared had made her weak at the knees. She knew he loved her, but was scared that she wasn't good enough for him; that he would see her and realise he was making a mistake.

**Now I see  
****This is the way it's supposed to be  
****I met you and now I see  
****This is the way it should be **

They arrived at Norfolk with plenty of time to spare. The Patrick Henry could just be seen navigating through the channel that led to the Norfolk Navy Yard. Mac felt her heart skip a beat. This was it.

Bud and Harriet, with little AJ in her arms, patiently followed her as she made her way through the crowds to join what seemed to be an entire gaggle of expectant wives and girlfriends, the majority of whom had babies in their arms or toddlers standing next to them.

"What time is it Mac?" Harriet asked

"11.13" Mac replied absently, her eyes nervously fixed on the hulking dark shape that was inching its way towards the dock. Harriet smiled knowingly at her friend. She was over the moon that they had finally admitted their feelings for each other, and she could tell Mac was nervous.

"How much leave does Harm have before he comes back to JAG?" she asked, shifting slightly as AJ started to wake up in her arms.

"2 weeks I think." Mac looked at her, "Do you want me to take him?" she nodded towards the now fidgeting child.

"Sure, thanks." Harriet replied as she handed her son over. "I'm sure he can't wait to see you." she added softly, so Bud couldn't hear her. Mac smiled at her gratefully.

From behind them, a marching band started to play and Mac's attention snapped straight back to the Patrick Henry, which was now mooring. Hundreds of sailors could be seen on the decks, waving and cheering.

**This is the way it should be for lovers  
****They shouldn't go it alone  
****It's not so good when you're on your own **

The new fathers disembarked first, racing down the gangway to find their wives and girlfriends and meet their children for the first time. Harm grinned as Tuna slapped him on the back, and joined the throng. _Well this is it_ he thought to himself. He joined the queue of sailors with Skates and started scanning the crowd, trying to seek out Mac's dark brown hair.

"Do you see her?" Skates asked as they walked slowly down the gangplank. Harm shook his head, not quite trusting his voice, his eyes still scanning the crowd until he suddenly spotted her standing slightly to the side of the group of women and children who were now being joined by sailors. She was standing with a child in her arms, and he felt his heart skip a beat at the image it presented. He knew it was AJ, the blonde hair and the presence of Bud and Harriet a couple of feet behind her served to remind him of that, but the idea of Mac holding their child in her arms was something else. He knew, now more than ever, that he wanted that kind of future with her.

"She's over there." He said, finally finding his voice.

"Well go get her, sailor." Harm looked at her for a moment, then, much to her surprise, pulled her into a quick hug.

"I'll miss you, Liz" he said smiling at her. Skates laughed,

"I'll miss you too Hammer. Now go get the girl will you?!" Harm chuckled.

"Is John here yet?" he replied, knowing how much Skates was looking forward to seeing her big brother, who was meeting her instead of her husband who was serving in Iraq. Skates nodded, and gave him a little push.

"He's over there waiting patiently. Now go, will you! She's waiting for you!"

"I'm going, I'm going." Harm responded good-naturedly, "Look me up next time you come to Washington, ok?" Skates nodded,

"Just make sure I get an invite to the wedding!"

"See you later," he replied, rolling his eyes at her and then, nervously, started making his way towards Mac, Bud and Harriet.

**So come to me  
****Now we can be what we wanna be  
****I love you and now I see  
****This is the way it should be **

He stopped in front of her, a nervous smile lighting up his face. She looked so beautiful.

"Hi Mac." He said quietly, never taking his eyes of hers. They stared in silence at each other for a second, then both moved forward at once, falling into a clumsy embrace. Mac buried her head into his chest for a moment, before pulling back and looking up at him.

"Welcome back," she said, with a shy grin, before he leaned down and pressed his lips onto hers in a kiss that made both Bud and Harriet, who were watching the scene with soppy grins on their faces, blush like there was no tomorrow. AJ was watching the scene with the interest that one a toddler can show. He squirmed in his father's arms, and tried to slide to the ground. Bud lowered him gently to stand on his feet and kept hold of his hand. AJ looked up at his father and then to the still kissing couple. He pulled away from his father and toddled, in his unsteady way, up to them and grabbed hold of Harm's trousers to stop himself from falling over. (**AN: I am putting AJ to be about 14 months here)**

The sudden tugging motion caused Harm to pull back from the kiss, blushing hotly.

"I should go away more often if that's the welcome I'm going to get!" he murmured softly, causing Mac to blush even more than she was before. He then looked down at the little boy who was staring up at him with wide blue eyes. He bent down quickly and pulled the little boy up into his arms,

"My god, AJ, you are quite the little heffalump" he groaned, giving the little boy a kiss on the cheek and then glanced behind Mac to Bud and Harriet. He moved over to them quickly, pulling Harriet into a half hug and shaking Bud's hand.

"Bud, Harriet, it's so good to see you both." He said with an easy smile. "I didn't expect to see you!"

"Welcome back, sir! I mean, Harm." Bud replied, "It'll be good to have you back at JAG." Harriet nodded her agreement.

"Thanks." Harm replied, turning to reach for Mac pulling her to his side and wrapping his arm around her, "it's good to be back." Mac couldn't help but blush again at this new side of Harm.

"Shall we go?" Harriet asked,

"Sure." Harm turned and glanced one more time in the direction of the Patrick Henry's flight deck, then turned back to the group. "Let's go."

They started to thread their way through the slowly dispersing crowds.

"Do you want me to take AJ, Commander?" Bud asked, glancing at the little boy who seemed to be contentedly pulling at the gold wings on Harm's uniform. Harm glanced at Mac, longing to hold and kiss her again, and replied

"Sure, thanks Bud." As he relinquished his hold on the little boy, passing him over to his father. As Bud and Harriet moved off, Harm paused, causing Mac to look up at him.

"I've missed you so much." He said softly, flashing his flyboy grin at her, as he leant down for another kiss. When they pulled back, both looking a little flustered,

"I've missed you too." Mac replied, "so much."

**This is the way it should be  
****This is the way it should be for lovers  
****They shouldn't go it alone  
****It's not so good when you're on your own **

"Where do you want us to drop you both?" Harriet twisted round to look at the couple who were curled up together on the back seat, Mac with her head on Harm's shoulder. He looked down at her, the question in his eyes,

"Do you want to go to the loft? Make sure it's still standing after 6 months?!" Mac said with a grin.

"You mean you didn't water my plants?!" Harm replied, teasingly.

"I went and got some food in and tidied your place up a bit, so we can go there if you want." She replied, rolling her eyes at him.

"I want to go wherever you go." Harm replied softly, grinning at the look of awe on her face.

"In which case, do you mind if we go to mine?" she replied, thinking of the newly purchased lingerie set sitting in her wardrobe, along with the general comfort of her flat, in comparison to the slightly incomplete, bachelor pad feel of his loft.

"That's fine, honey." Harm said, the endearment slipping out before he could stop it. To his delight, Mac blushed and lowered her eyes shyly and he gently pressed a kiss onto her soft hair.

"Georgetown it is then." Harriet said, unable to stop the huge grin from appearing on her face at the sight of the pair of them together; they were just too adorable.

**I'm very sure  
****This never happened to me before  
****I met you and now I'm sure  
****This never happened before  
****This never happened before **

After Bud and Harriet had dropped them off, they stood in Mac's apartment in silence for a moment, both suddenly nervous at being left alone together.

"Can I get you a drink?" she asked, saying anything to break the silence that had been growing exponentially between them. The corners of Harm's mouth twitched in amusement,

"No." He said softly, taking a small step towards her. Mac licked her lips nervously,

"Anything to eat?" He shook his head.

"No." He took another step.

"Do you want a shower?" she was rewarded with a full-blown flyboy grin.

"No." he stopped in front of her and reached out to tilt her chin upwards so he could see her face. Leaning down, he gently kissed her, pulling her into his strong embrace and running one hand up her side to tangle in her hair. As the kiss grew more passionate, they moved towards Mac's bedroom as if connected by the same thought, collapsing on her bed, pulling at each other's clothes.

**This never happened before  
****This never happened before **

A short while later, Harm was woken by the sound of thunder and rain against the window panes. He shifted slightly, careful not to wake Mac, who was curled up, with her head on his chest, her arm flung carelessly across his torso. He couldn't ever remember being this comfortable, or this happy. It was then that it occurred to him; he was finally home.

**This never happened before  
****This never happened before  
****This never happened before**

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So that's the end! Hands up for more!! (or even, press the blue button and let me know if you want more! As I have a couple more chapter ideas...although this is where I originally planned to finish)

**Thanks for sticking with me through this, all your reviews have been great, thank you for taking the time both to read and review! **


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